A Mother’s Story - Tania
As I discovered, there is a big difference between thinking about your testimony and actually writing it down on paper.  When trying to think of what I would say, I realized that the Lord had chosen to work slowly in my life and I am still a work-in-process.  There has been no flash of light or booming voice in the middle of the night.  Instead, my conversion process has gradually unfolded over the years.
I grew up in a large family and attended church every Sunday, sang in the choir, joined youth group and later as a teenager taught Sunday school.  However, when I look back I realize that religion at that point was more and intellectual and social experience.  As a young adult I wandered away from the church and for many years I dabbled with new age philosophy and the occult.  One of the defining moments for me was when we had to send our daughter away to Christian boarding school for troubled girls.  I started reading the Bible and questioning the beliefs of my childhood church.
When the first program did not work for my daughter we found, or should I say, the Lord led us to House of Hope.  This is now the second go around for our family at the House of Hope.  Fortunately for our family the Lord is very patient.  Through parenting classes and counseling I am learning to rely on the Lord and not myself for guidance.  The Lord has shown me areas in my life that need healing; a sometimes painful process, but one for which I am grateful.  The more I let go and trust God, the easier it has been to deal with life’s trials and tribulations.  I know that He will always be there and I am looking forward to what the Lord has in store for me in the second half of my life.

A Mother’s Story - Patti
My precious daughter, Patti, started off difficult, being born in a breach position. She was always a strong-willed child, but sadly I didn’t realize it until she was around twelve years old. Then I realized that I had not been strong enough as a single, working mother to deal with the challenges I was about to face.

I was divorced from my husband when Patti was only seven years old. Her brother was five at the time. I had no one to help me, so I had to work long hours to make ends meet. I also decided to further my education as much as my schedule permitted, and I went to vocational school during that time.

I had come out of drug abuse myself and was far from an ideal parent and certainly did not provide the best atmosphere for my children to grow up in. My own mother practiced witchcraft and lived with a warlock. I was twenty-five when I was divorced and by the time I was thirty-one, I realized that I really, really needed God in my life. I was wonderfully saved and delivered. Up to that time, Patti did quite well in school and I really didn’t have any problems with her. But it seems that right after my life was turned around, things got really difficult. She rebelled terribly and got into the skinhead movement. It was so hard for me because I had found God, and the devil seemed to manifest through her. It got worse and worse at our home. She would leave for days and not let me know where she was. I would have to call the police and they would tell me that I was responsible for whatever she did because she was a minor.

She was very violent and destructive during those years prior to House of Hope. We had many bouts with the law. I really became a desperate woman. Even the youth pastor at our church didn’t know what to do with her. When we went to visit him, she went into a trance state, with her Mohawk hairdo, face painted white, black lips, black clothes, boots and tattoos.

Well, after trying for almost two years to get help from every organization I heard about, I finally received a glimmer of light from House of Hope. They sure are named appropriately, for I had almost lost hope. I went there, and even though I couldn’t possibly pay them, they took in Patti. Actually, she didn’t want to go at all but she didn’t have a choice. She had been before the judge so many times that he was fed up with her, and he told her to go try this program or else get locked up until she was nineteen. She was fifteen at the time. I was not living near the Orlando House of Hope, but that two-hour drive was worth it to see what was happening to my daughter.

I had to go there and receive counseling myself and participate in the program. I too received much healing from these times, and our home began to be reconciled at long last. Patti had to be delivered from a generational curse of witchcraft that came through my mother’s involvement. She also received healing from the hurts of rejection she received from her dad not being there for her.

Patti eventually became an example for other girls coming out of their difficult times. Now Patti is thirty-five and graduated from college and is studying for her master’s. She has beautiful long blonde hair with olive skin and red lips and tattoos removed. She is very busy working and raising three children and lives  with me. I am so proud of her. I am really eternally indebted to House of Hope. They never made me feel bad for not being able to pay. And to this day they are very much a part of our lives, and I suppose always will be. I thank God in Heaven for Sara Trollinger [our counselor] and her lifelong commitment. When no one else was there, she was. May the Lord above grant her eternal rewards for what she has done in our lives alone, not to mention all the others that have been changed through House of Hope.

A Mother’s Story - Tammy
My daughter had always been the “good one.” Tammy did well in school, was obedient, trustworthy and seemed to be fairly happy…until she turned fifteen. There were signs before, but I hadn’t realized how serious the situation was. Her brokenness and woundedness came out as anger and rebellion. She wasn’t going to school. She was using drugs, sneaking out at night and completely falling apart. Her depression was terrifying. She had tried to kill herself and nothing anyone was doing was helping.

Three years before, we had moved to Florida from New Mexico—a transfer with my job and God’s perfect timing to get me out of another unhealthy relationship, I thought. As a family, we had no idea what the Lord had planned for us. I had been an alcoholic, and even though I had been sober for over five years at this time, the damage had been done to my children who were products of generational curses. I was a wounded person creating broken people. I had accepted Jesus as my Savior, and He was turning my life around, but the destruction of my past was enormous.

Memorial Day 1996, I drove to House of Hope, a Christian residential program (and so much more) that my mail carrier had told me about. My son, Cory, sat in the backseat with Tammy to keep her from jumping out of the car into the traffic on the turnpike. She had been on the waiting list for a very short time, but didn’t know exactly when she was going in until the night before. She was livid!
The last year in our home had been a time of horror, never knowing what would happen next. I spent my time on the floor of the bathroom on my face crying out to God for help.

I know now how perfect God’s timing is. We left her at House of Hope with her hating me, crying, her brother crying, and everyone else in the family hating me. There are times when you know that you know what the Lord wants you to do, no matter what anyone else says or does. Tammy didn’t speak to me for the first few months she was there, unless she was made to, out of respect. I kept asking Sara and the staff if I could come live there, saying, “This is where I need to be.” At one point, Tammy said she didn’t want me there. I was going for counseling, parenting classes, and coming for all visitations. I finally had to tell my daughter that her anger was not going to push me away or make me stop loving her and that I was coming there for me! I knew this was not just her problem, but the whole family’s. I had to be willing to be teachable and to do whatever it took. I decided that whatever Tammy was doing at House of Hope, I would do at home, memorizing Scriptures, reading, devotions, studying and being willing to allow the Lord to do what He wanted to do in me.

Tammy was in the program for twenty months. She led her father, who was in California, to the Lord over the phone. After graduation, she got her GED, at seventeen entered Bible school, graduated and returned to House of Hope as a house staff, a mighty woman of God!! Today at twenty-seven, she is absolutely beautiful. She’s still clean—eleven years now—and holds a high management
position at one of the city’s finest resorts. Did I mention that she is my best friend? God did that.

The Lord is still healing us, restoring our family, tearing down strongholds, breaking generational curses, and He has even redeemed the time that was lost. Malachi 4:6 is a reality in our family. Praise God!

A Mother’s Story - Beth
I was born in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, and remember my upbringing as very normal and family focused. Our family was involved with community events, local sports and weekly “family-only” events. Sitting down every night for dinner as a family without interruptions was a priority. I remember my dad always making time for each one of his children yet still working two jobs to make ends meet. My mom was always making sure we felt loved. Work was always difficult in Pittsburgh, and an opportunity for a teaching position became available in Maryland for my dad. My parents decided that’s what would be best for the family, and we moved to Maryland in 1984.

I was devastated. Pittsburgh was where I grew up. This was my home, my roots and my best friends of seventeen years. And now my parents were pulling everything from under me with one big jolt and without much notice. I had just graduated from high school, and going to college was going to be hard enough. I attended college in St. Augustine, Florida, in the fall of 1984, and before I knew it I was in a relationship that I thought would last for the rest of my life. I met the man of my dreams. He was tall, thin, handsome and played basketball. Any priorities I had before meeting Dan weren’t priorities anymore. He became my priority. Whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted it and however he talked to me—it was OK. Before I could blink, I had lost all my friends, all my values and pushed my family aside, and Dan was making my decisions. I had lost who I was.

The relationship became verbally and mentally abusive within the first six months. I made excuses as to why it was going on and would say “It’s OK. Dan promised me it wouldn’t happen again.” My family finally stepped in and physically removed me from the relationship July 1985. They brought me home to Maryland and tried to keep us apart. I wouldn’t listen. I thought I knew what was best and, after all, I loved Dan. He promised me he wouldn’t do it again. In October 1985 I found out I was pregnant. I was 19 and lost. The pressure was on by Dan, and in his mind the only thing we could do was get married and have the baby. We were married February 8, 1986, in Maryland, and our daughter was born March 27, 1986.

The verbal and mental abuse continued and it became so bad I was scared for our lives. I didn’t know what to do because I was scared to stay, and I was even more afraid to leave. I finally got the courage to leave. This was only the beginning to what you will read next. Dan didn’t want custody of Beth, but he did want to hurt me so he used Beth to do this. During a weekend visitation he not only relocated within the state without telling anyone, he also decided to keep Beth. It took thirty days for me to see Beth again, and I vividly remember hiding under a car just to see her from a distance. Within the next couple of months, Dan vanished again with Beth. This time when I went to pick up Beth for our Wednesday evening visit, the apartment was empty. Dan had packed up his things, packed up Beth and headed to Florida.

The court system was involved for four years, and during those years, Beth became the victim. She was back and forth between Dan’s temporary custody and my temporary custody. It came to an end August 1992. Dan was awarded full custody. I was awarded reasonable visitation and mandated to pay child support. Dan continued to live in Florida after he was awarded full custody, so seeing Beth on a regular basis was very difficult. Not only was I dealing with the decision that was made by the judge, I knew firsthand that Beth would receive the same treatment from Dan that I did.

I did everything I could, to the best of my ability with what I had, but that wasn’t enough for Beth or me. After eight years of long distance communication and visits, my husband and I relocated to Florida. If the courts wouldn’t change custody and see that it was in the best interest of Beth to be fully involved in our lives, then I would have to rely on nature to work things out. Beth came to live with us the summer of 2000 [when she was fourteen years old]. She also brought along her wounds of feeling abandoned by me, hurts that her dad had just rejected her, and the learned negative verbal and mental behaviors from the last eight years. Our relationship with her became a living nightmare. We began with weekly counseling, but that wasn’t enough. As time went on, Beth was moving at a pace none of us could keep up with. I thought with each episode, I could help her through it. It was at the point where we were afraid of being in the same house with her because we never knew when she would rage. These rages included verbal and physical destruction.

I came to terms with the fact that Beth and our family needed help. I couldn’t be the savior anymore. If I wanted any chance of Beth surviving her life, I had to turn it over to God and allow him to work the miracle I thought I could do. He had been knocking on my front door for a long time, and I ignored his knocks. I couldn’t ignore them anymore. I remember getting ready to leave House of Hope campus in January 2002 after I had just finished the process of admitting Beth into the program. I was emotionally, physically and spiritually exhausted. I stopped and began to pray.

As tears flowed down my cheeks, I began, “Heavenly Father, I release Beth to you. She is your child. Please take her, hold her and surround her with Your angels of strength and wisdom. I believe this is the right thing to do and have faith You will lead us to where we need to go. I understand we will not be reunited as a family until You say it’s time. I am committed to You and Your guidance.”

Through the passion and commitment of the servant leaders at House of Hope and messages from God, miracles began to happen. The “do it yourself ” toolbox that we had brought with us to House of Hope had been emptied and a “God-centered” toolbox began to be filled with the power of forgiveness, unconditional love, boundaries, being in control of ourselves instead of controlling, listening and communication tips, learning how to say “I’m sorry,” and relearning the
basics of parenting and relationships.

After numerous parenting sessions, counseling sessions and focused prayer time, our family graduated from the program in April 2003. We will be forever grateful for the opportunities presented to our family to heal and restore our relationships with each other. It would be very difficult for me to choose the most spiritual opportunity that was given to our family during our time at House of Hope; however, for me personally, I can remember this like it was yesterday. It was a Tuesday night at parenting class. This night was unusual because we weren’t learning about life skills, and Dan was present. This was the only parenting night Dan ever attended. It was going to be a night of prayer by a visiting intercessor. This would be a first for me. (This experience I am about to tell you about was completely voluntary and nothing or no one pressured me into this.) The intercessor asked for all persons interested in being prayed for to come up in front of the gymnasium. The next thing I knew, I was standing in the front of the gymnasium, waiting for someone to pray over me. This is very unlike me. I usually pray very quietly and privately. As I stood holding Beth’s right hand and Dan holding her left hand, I was very uncomfortable, nervous and my palms were sweating. I had a strong feeling we were up there for a reason. I didn’t know what to expect but felt calmness about what was getting ready to happen.

The intercessor approached me and began to pray out loud. I thought to myself, “Oh my—everyone can hear what she is saying to me.” Then something came over me, and I was completely relaxed and I let go of any hesitation. The presence of God was overwhelming. As the intercessor prayed over me, I began to release the hatred and resentment I had toward Dan.

The House of Hope staff gave me some time to pull myself together and realize what I had just  experienced. Then Dan and I were brought together face-to-face. Could I do what the intercessor told me I needed to do? Could I look Dan in the eye and forgive him for everything he had done to Beth and me? With Sara’s assistance, Dan asked me to forgive him for the pain he caused Beth and me. I looked him in the eye and very sincerely and truthfully said, “I forgive you.” By being confronted with this and dealing with it, I had just accomplished what I never thought I could do. I freed myself from the hurts and wounds of a previous situation that was killing any possibility of present or future happiness. By doing this, truthfully and sincerely, I would now be able to move forward with restoring my relationship with myself, my husband (who had been so patient with me) and with Beth. That’s exactly what I did.

Since April 2003 our family has continued to focus on the importance of strengthening our relationship with God, listening, communicating, understanding each other’s needs and wants, and always trying to do a better job today than we did yesterday.

Beth graduated from high school with honors in May 2004 and will attend a private university in the fall to study occupational therapy. My husband and I continue to practice the life skills learned at House of Hope with each other and our three younger children, who are four, two and one.